Handbook of Winterology
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| Thanks to NSICD photo by Rich Herrman |
Author: not known
Publisher: Hodder & Stoughton (real life publishers)
Source book: Early Rising by Jasper Fforde
There are a number of mentions of The Handbook of Winterology in Early Riser, and we learn there are multiple editions.
The 1st edition has some weird information about barographs recording atmospheric pressure, but also being able to detect a pulse weapon. At about a kilometre away, but less in a snowstorm. And there’s also information about winter larders (winter pantry), and Spring Tuck: when you wake in the spring obviously you want readily available food. And you want it now.
The 4th edition warns against the possibility of incautious winter loans. And has information about the Winter Nomads. Displaced during the Great Ottoman Diaspora in the 14th and 15th centuries, they live in the far north and it is rumoured they do not hibernate at all and suffer no ill effects.
The average temperature in Wales is 16 degrees. Presumably degrees C, which is 61 degrees F. However, temperatures can vary from plus 32 to minus 68. The lowest temperature recorded in Wales was at Llandudno in 1976: -78 degrees C.
We read that the residents are well adapted to the climate. But sleepers who had not bulked up sufficient fat before the winter sleep are more likely to wake and need sustenance.
The 6th edition advises that night watchmen, those who in more modern times are Consuls and other Winterers, were traditionally eunuchs. Although this is no longer a requirement, it still enjoys popular support.
And so many skilled people were likely to die during the winter, every job was devised with SillZero protocols in mind. Apparently anyone who achieves an 82% pass or higher could run anything from a fast food joint to a Graphite Reactor.
The 9th edition tells us that Professional Winterers (for example Consuls) have no time for the quacks and shamans who pretend to help people through the winter. Obviously people should be grateful to the professionals who are employed to ensure safe winters, but we all know foolish people will always trust the quacks before the experts. No, don’t tell me I’m wrong because they will.
The 10th edition tells us that your Dormitorium, where you first spend a winter, becomes part of you, a family you belong to. And it is rare that anyone moves to another.
Lots of stuff you need to learn if you know nothing about sleeping through the winter.
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| Thanks to Met Office |
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